Monday, December 14, 2009

All Andrew Landeryou wants for Christmas is....readers

Siteanalytics, the independent website audience measurement provider, has revealed that only 142 people were bothered to read Vexnews in November.

It seems the only thing that 'Editor in Chief' Andrew Landeryou really wants for Christmas is readers.

While Vexnews slips away into obscurity, everyone at Team Slanderyou wishes Patriots everywhere a safe holiday season, and all the best for 2010. We will return from mid January.

448 Truth On Comments:

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J Ward ARARAT Gaol said...

If the criminal lunatic Andrew Landeryou was transferred here, there would be an immediate riot among prisoners and staff - and probably the people of Ararat.

Everyone here regards Landeryou as a contemptible Asshole who should be trialled, convicted, and placed in solitary confinement on Three Hummock Island in Bass Straight for Eternity.

Andrew's Mother said...

My boy Andrew is so hated and made to look bad on this blog. This is so unfair and makes a mother angry and very tearful.

I had to keep breast-feeding him until he was 19.

And, yes, he went through my purse several times daily looking for 'change'.

I found his collection of boys' magazines several years ago. I made him throw out 'Teenage Gestapo Nurses No. 10', 'Waffen SS Sodomists' and 'Zyklon B Suckers'.

His career has reduced me to sobs many times, and has sent his own Mum and Dad broke.

Bill and I never liked Dimberley who always spoke in a deep, manly voice. I noticed several times she smelled of Lynx Aftershave. But Andrew seemed to love her deeply until he had to scoot off to Costa Rica suddenly on a sabbatical.

None of my extended family know anything about IQ Corp or something called 'company papers' which mean nothing to me as a quiet, aged lady. There were a lot of trash can fires at the time, but I just thought Andrew was being naughty again.

Anonymous said...

Landeryou has returned from three weeks holiday, refreshed and rested - and ready for a New Year of defamation, stalking and reckless lies.

I haven't heard any sane person calling Tony Abbott a pedophile who preys on choirboys.

But the following are just two comments suggesting that he is:

Oh gee George please pass me the rosary beads and send the Little Blonde Choir Boy into my chamber.

Posted by Mad Monk | January 15, 2010, 16:06

No one rogers Choir Boys like me.

Posted by Mad Monk | January 15, 2010, 19:27

Abbott is often referred to as the Mad Monk. Vexnews has form on libels like this - ask Pissy Chryne.

All will be revealed when Landeryou's PC is forensically examined. Who knows what will be found?

Ronnie said...

Andrew hides the most incriminating USB memory sticks up his hooha. He is confident that noone would ever dare to retrieve them. He is probably correct.

When he yells "Fetch" at me, I always play dead. Usually the Sarge kindly helps Andrew out though.

Anonymous said...

Some sick and sinister lunatic has vandalized the footpaths near my house with images of spurting phalluses and men mounting four legged animals. I believe it has to have been Landeryou.

Sgt. Sasha Uzunov said...

I object to a dog dobbing me in for grovelling in Landeryou's backside searching for USB memory sticks that may contain his personal porno and backups for the Vexnews Blog Site. The dog ia known to often climb in there for a quiet snooze!

I am an Australian Army Catering Corps hero who has thrown mashed potato at Timor Leste insurgents, and large dumplings against the muslim hordes in Afghanistan. Apparently I am being considered for a Channel Ten MasterChefs' Heroism Award. This will likely kick off my big, new televiaion career in OZ.

But after getting my degree at Centrelink Uni (I mean RMIT Uni of Technology), Landeryou tells me I could get easy preselection for an safe ALP seat like the seat of Toorak.

Cait Catt said...

My Tasmanian namesake is at it again. This time she is attacking Kevin Rudd. Always like to see Cait in print, or at least on line. I didn't think there were any intelligent Catts left, after reading the Catt family greetings on this blog and I was disappointed that I was left out. But my namesake, not included in the big list last year, at least has some intellect about her, even if she's a Lib. Why doesn't Brutus Beefcake try writing for some of the Murdoch media online readers comments? He writes well even if he does have a big you know what. Read on:

Tasmania a tiger economy when it doesn't have a decent railway? Where are all the new jobs? Mr Rudd is forcing thousands of Tasmanians into losing the prime of their lives, courtesy of his increasing the pension age to 67. You get your pension Mr Rudd when you leave parliament, and a very nice one it is too. Hypocritical. Labor is not the party of the workers any more.
Posted by: Cait Catt of Geeveston 9:43am today

Anonymous said...

Gay libels against a known pants man like Tony Abbott are just plain weird, even by Landeryou's standards.

He clearly has a lot of issues (over and above his transvestitism) he needs to project on people.

Watching the grass grow said...

I looked forward to watching test cricket on Channel Nine today, there to be swamped by avalanches of advertising. Between 2.40 pm and just after 3 pm, there were five advertising 'breaks', comprising eight advertisements, a sponsors listing and a news break.

Not that Channel Seven purveying tennis was any better. At every changeover, there were advertising breaks. HORRIBLE!

Channel Nine, of course, also supplies Betfair gambling details several times a day during their cricket coverage.

It's all getting way to weird for me! I think I will start to watch the grass grow - no Ads!

Slats said...

The cricket commentary team, presently on Channel Nine, is usually spot on. These are wonderful past cricketers, including Australian captains. Today they blew it! One of the members, I can't remember who, talked about a cricketing problem called a 'drut'. The whole commentary team team then started ruminating about what 'drut' could possibly mean.

When introduced to the Australian Army years ago, our Warrant Officer called us a "horrible bunch of druts - that's TURDS spelled backwards", he said. Thousands of former soldies would have winced and laughed out loud listening to the cricket today...

Liars rule OK said...

Vexnews makes people laugh uncontrollably too. There is no level of expertise there, just wacky, weak opinions, libels and stalking from a human dreg.

Landeryou demonstrates why politics is so repugnant, and why politicians of all colours can't be trusted.

If their lips are moving, they are lying!

Victorians deserve heaps better said...

AAAaaarrrgghh! My ministerial letter to Minister Kosky last July still hasn't been anwsered. The Age says she and several Brumby Ministers -- including Brumby -- are 'too busy'. Too busy doing what!

Kosky is a frightful disaster who should have been sacked years ago. She is lazy, couldn't find her fat arse with both hands, and has sacrificed commuters because of her execrable incompetance. F*ck off, you silly cow!

MyAss said...

Kosky has superintended the monumental Myki disaster protected by political immunities and indemnities.

It is time to review these, because she has cost the Victorian community billions of dollars. What an embarrassing, useless, crock of shit she is!

Start earning your bloated salaries, you crooked Victorian pollies, and stop screwing taxpayers and businesses because you are all hopeless wankers!

Weight Watchers Australia said...

Landeryou is in a league of his own over and above this:

Surge in obesity
The Sunday Age January 17, 2010

Three per cent of Australians are believed to be in the most extreme category of obesity.

ALMOST 500,000 Australians are ''super obese'', a fivefold increase during two decades, with weight loss surgeons reporting they are increasingly treating patients at serious risk of premature death.

Obesity experts estimate 2 to 3 per cent of the population are so large they have outgrown obese and morbidly obese classifications to become super obese, with some weighing more than 200 kilograms...

Weight Watchers Australia said...

Landeryou is in a league of his own over and above this:

Surge in obesity
The Sunday Age January 17, 2010

Three per cent of Australians are believed to be in the most extreme category of obesity.

ALMOST 500,000 Australians are ''super obese'', a fivefold increase during two decades, with weight loss surgeons reporting they are increasingly treating patients at serious risk of premature death.

Obesity experts estimate 2 to 3 per cent of the population are so large they have outgrown obese and morbidly obese classifications to become super obese, with some weighing more than 200 kilograms...

The Landeryou case SOLVED said...


Wanted: Big, hairy bloke in a bra

January 08, 2010 08:10am

A HEAVILY built man wearing nothing but women's underwear and a goatee beard is the subject of a police hunt...

Ancients of Mu Mu said...

Visited Vexnews today - its so quiet over there - eerily so.

Ima Mandarin said...

Melbourne Water's Western Treatment Plant at Werribee is presently reporting to government on misuse and over-usage of Melbourne's aging sewage infrastructure.

Mr Landeryou has been identified as both a misuser and over-user of the system. The misuse occurs when he empties unknown chemicals into the system (these are being examined by EPA currently). His over-use of the system places huge overloads during peak periods.

My Admin Assistant put it rather well, "Jeez, that guy produces a lot of shit"! I don't know if she was referring to Vexnews or his faecal detritus. In the end, I suppose, they are the same thing.

I have already advised the government that Mr Landeryou be expelled to Yemen or Somalia, but more detail of his 'output' was requested. I have a team working on this.

Stop It said...

If the crooked crim has at last abandoned Vexnews, what next?

Maybe Landeryou's New Year Resolutions included:

1. Stop telling lies.
2. Stop telling lies.
3. Stop telling lies.

Go and get a decent job that doesn't involve defaming Australian luminaries.

And stop telling lies.

Anonymous said...

El Gordo would like it at Werribee. Lots of other shits there.

Brutus Beefcake said...

Private dick, Cait? I've made it very public what I will do with my dick: me and Bubba and the rest of Hot Rodding Men.

Iceberg said...

Happy Xmas to you too David! That was a hoot. The best laugh today.

The nuggeted manifestation you met would have been Andrew Mugabeyou. He interferes in elections, manufacturing lies about candidates he doesn't like. But as you now know, he also gorges on free feeds for the needy at Xmas.

Hyacinth said...

This is a fascinating story. Buddha Boy has stolen much, much more and spent it all on KFC, flagons of sweet sherry and female attire from the Big Beautiful Women Boutique at Cragieburn.

Bank fraud criminal spent proceeds like ``Monopoly money'

David Barbeler

BRISBANE, Dec 22 - A Brisbane employee who stole almost $3 million from the Bank of Queensland (BOQ) and then spent it like ``Monopoly money'' on cars, jewellery and holidays has been sentenced to nine years' jail.

Reecson Wentworth Denford, 24, of Ascot, pleaded guilty in the Brisbane District Court on Tuesday to one count of fraud over a 20-month period totalling $2.935 million.

The court heard Denford illegally made hundreds of transactions between November 2006 and August 2008 while working for EDS Pty Ltd, a company employed by BOQ for onsite accounting and computer services.

Prosecutor Julie Aylward told the court Denford discovered a loophole where he could make unchecked credit voucher transactions under $10,000 to a body corporate sinking fund looked after by his wife, then forward the money to his personal account.

She said he would then purchase depreciating items with the money, most of which lost half their value the moment they left the store.

Some of the more lavish purchases included a trip to the world's only seven-star hotel, in Dubai, a $100,000 BMW, a $70,000 Mini Cooper, $450,000 worth of French champagne and $320,000 worth of jewellery.

From the $2.935 million, only an amount of $536,374 was recovered through the sale of his purchases, Ms Aylward said.

``It seems he has low self-esteem and the need to purchase friends was behind the spending,'' she said.

``He really spent the proceeds as if it were Monopoly money.''

Jenny Jensen-Hansen said...

You tell them Cait. Of course you are not Landeryou. You are too independent minded to be a sock puppet. When Slanderyou mentioned sock puppets once he omitted your name after calling you all the names about the place. I think Slanderyou admires you Cait. Perhaps he has been a client of your sister Fatt at the Daily Planet.

Anonymous said...

Looking forward to your Christmas KFC Andy?

Jail the bum said...

Is Landeryou out of bankruptcy yet or still pretending to be bankrupt in the hope he doesn't get sued?

Anonymous said...

Darren Ray was released from gaol at the end of 2008.

Do your own research.

Landeryou is a scary stalker said...

Mr McVeigh said security guards patrolled his home 24 hours a day. Photos of his house, cars, dog and backyard had been put on a website operated by Mr Landeryou. He told of a threat he said Mr Landeryou made during an adjournment of the liquidator's examination into the collapse of the student union. Mr Landeryou allegedly said he would "do you slowly".

Marshal Zhukov said...

I look forward to the "Downfall" video of Fat Andrew in his Fat Cave raving about Vexnews' readership in the same way Hitler directed phantom armies from his bunker when to everyone else his failure was clear.

A digital effects whiz could make the Landeryou "Downfall" video quite fun. They could enlarge Hitler to Landeryou-like size (1,800 pounds, I understand) and cover the floor of the bunker with empty bottles of Aldi Sweet Sherry and discarded Family Feast tubs from KFC.

Tony the Resurrectionist said...

Tony has selected a shadow front bench of tired Howard remnants. These were the very people emphatically voted OUT in 2007.

As a Nazi Hate Blogger, I suppose it was natural that Landeryou - the Mad Skunk - would support Abbott, the Mad Monk!

Tony Abbott will get squished shortly.

Anonymous said...

So Landeryou now thieves from charities! Disgusting!

Brutus Beefcake said...

There will be no long-term overcrowding problem with Landeryou. He will top himself within weeks of meeting me.

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